The Virginia Department of Nature announced today that the Confederate battle flag will be removed from all trees and bushes in the Commonwealth.
The battle flag on a tree could suggest that the tree is descended from a tree planted in a state where slaveholders once lived, the department said in an issued statement.
“We have been working in conjunction with the Virginia Department of Cultural Heritage and Purging to ensure a safe and unoffensive woodland experience for all Virginians,” department spokesperson Lance Cabella explained.
“Besides,” Cabella said, “Nature is supposed to be peaceful. A battle flag represents battle, which runs contrary to that.”
The Sons of Fallen Confederates have decried the department’s decision.
“Nothing says ‘I love you’ like carving a battle flag into a tree with your girlfriend’s initials,” spokesman Nathan Mosby Jackson Lee said. “But apparently now, a tree’s bark really is worse than its bite.”